8.1.18 | better off alone

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"Don't go back to what hurt you," they say.
Why not just become it, instead?
So I'll string her along,
and flirt,
act interested,
hookup when its convenient,
lie about my feelings,
throw my heart in the freezer to keep it fresh,
go all out.
Fuck it.
When did I turn into everything I've ever loathed?
When did I turn into exactly who hurt me?
I've been nothing but honest with my feelings my entire life
and it has gotten me nowhere.
Maybe I'm better off alone with a really good lie to keep me company.

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