3/28 | 2.3.18 | February Writing Challenge

3/28 | February Writing Challenge

3. What was the last thing you read, heard, or saw that inspired you?

I sat in a chair for seven hours today, listening to my hair stylist vent to a co-worker about her boyfriend who cheated on her.

"I just get angry about it sometimes. It just comes in huge waves and suddenly, I'm angry about it."

And I understood-- more than anything, I understood.

For once, I heard someone say what I felt whenever I was hurt; the recognition that the seas could be calm once again, that things could be "normal," but sometimes storms still happened, regardless of the clear skies minutes before.

Sometimes things are fine, things feel so fine and I could go days, weeks, maybe months without thinking about it (whatever "it" even is), and in the snap of a finger, in the downward swipe of my phone screen, in the split second their name graces the presence of my ears-- it all comes back.

Maybe it's not anger exclusively. 

Maybe it's sadness, and frustration, and regret, oh so much regret.

Things could be fine, I could be fine, they could be in or out of my life, but my feelings don't discriminate due to circumstance; trauma doesn't care how long it's been, whether I'm still with them, or whether I still talk to them.

It comes down to the unfortunate truth that I am going to feel this for a long time.

I've let go, I really have. 

But sometimes, you hold onto something for so long that you could still feel it in the palm of your hand once it's gone.