12.9.17

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four am.
feet cold on bathroom tiles.
freshwater river running down my face.
hands shaking.
mouth open.
high pitched sobs escape.
I want someone and no one at the same time.
i’m all alone anyway.
I miss them more than I could properly explain.
but I can’t numb this feeling away.
“why do you smoke?”
I need something to feel anything but this.

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