June 2nd, 2017 - August 8th, 2017
I shouldn’t be counting down days until the breakup, I should be counting down the days until the breakdown from the end of this relationship, I should be in preparation to mourn, but mourning has become my permanent state.
But he touches me with fingers like poison-tipped needles, paralyzing my every move in the worst way possible; not the heart-stopping, starstruck, paralyzed with love-feeling, either. I’m paralyzed with nothing left to say, the only numbness stemming from his scratchy lips on my neck, lining it with bruises as I nudge him away.
He asks about my scars, not realizing he’s leaving new ones internally.
He invalidates my feelings as I yawn and close my eyes, the sandman having more power over me than he has.
I scrub myself in the shower, eager to get the feeling of him off of me, clawing at my own neck with a loofah in attempt to wash away his artificial sweetness.
It was nice watching the rain with you, but the rain is down pouring inside of my mind and I think I’d like to go.
But he touches me with fingers like poison-tipped needles, paralyzing my every move in the worst way possible; not the heart-stopping, starstruck, paralyzed with love-feeling, either. I’m paralyzed with nothing left to say, the only numbness stemming from his scratchy lips on my neck, lining it with bruises as I nudge him away.
He asks about my scars, not realizing he’s leaving new ones internally.
He invalidates my feelings as I yawn and close my eyes, the sandman having more power over me than he has.
I scrub myself in the shower, eager to get the feeling of him off of me, clawing at my own neck with a loofah in attempt to wash away his artificial sweetness.
It was nice watching the rain with you, but the rain is down pouring inside of my mind and I think I’d like to go.
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